Never in my life did I imagine myself telling my kids that they were not allowed to be friends with someone. Granted, there may by some characters out there that I would prefer that they not be friends with, but I would never be the mom who tells them that they aren’t allowed to be their friend. That is, I thought this until I met Lucy… A 5 year old little girl in my son’s kindergarten class. And I’m sorry son, but you can’t be friends with her.

Now, you should know that this hasn’t been an easy thing to say. We’ve been through a lot to get to this point. But Lucy is just not a good, well-behaved kid. Her mom is a teacher, which to me says that she should be and is why I didn’t have a problem with the friendship in the beginning. But Lucy makes my son behave in ways that he shouldn’t. She tells him to go stand on his head when he should be doing schoolwork, he does it. She tells him to take another kid’s crayons away, and he does it. She tells him to cut his own hair, and he does it. The latest was telling him to cut pictures out of a library book… And he did it. I had to pay for the book.

This caused the “you can’t be friends” conversation where I told him he either had to start telling Lucy no, or he just couldn’t be friends with her anymore. Along comes yesterday. She started her usual antics with him, asking him to do things that would get him in trouble. He told her no. She told him that she wouldn’t be his friend if he didn’t. He says “Well, Riley will still be my friend.” and went about his business. I couldn’t be prouder of my son.

Apparently, what I didn’t know is that if you’re not Lucy’s friend, you are Lucy’s mortal enemy… And I have set off the ticking time bomb that is Lucy by encouraging my child to tell her no. He came home yesterday with one sleeve almost completely cut off his coat, and with several slices cut into it throughout the jacket as well. His brand new coat that he got for Christmas. Of course, he didn’t tell me about it, I had to find the evidence buried deep in his bookbag yesterday evening.

Now, I’m not afraid of a five year old. I’m pretty sure I can punk her out and make her think I’d whip her and her momma… But I don’t think that’s the best option. I have reported the situation to the school principal and the teacher, because I honestly believe that the child needs some psychological help, but I don’t know if it will do a lot of good. To say I’m frustrated and completely pissed off is an understatement. I still don’t understand how half the antics that go on are allowed to happen in a kindergarten class, but on top of that, I now have to buy my son a new coat.

So, sorry son, but you can’t be friends with her… Mommy can’t afford it.